Thursday, March 6, 2014
Just one of my many distractions lately....
It's possible this is just a faze. I hope so. But I need to be realistic here too. Time for myself isn't going to be happening for quite awhile. Not to mention, we aren't planning for this to be our last baby either.
I know plenty of moms who seem to blog so effortlessly regardless of having numerous children. I know if I put my mind to it I could too but the thing is...... I'm not sure if I want to.
There, I said it.
At least, not right now. My focus is elsewhere. It's on this family I am creating. I'm not sure if I am doing anything good by chronicling our lives or if I am just taking time away that I could be spending with them.
But when I think about shutting this space down, even temporarily, I get all emotional. I can't let go.
The problem with leaving this place up and just writing when the time presents itself or when the urge arises is that it will always be calling me. Even when I tell myself I don't have to post, I still feel the pressure to do so. Even if I didn't have an audience I think I would feel this way. I'm fairly certain it's this pressure that is making me stark raving mad right now.
The pressure to post is in my head though, obviously. There is no reason why this space can't remain and that I can't just write when I damn well feel the need. Yet....... I feel like I am letting myself down all the time by not posting regularly. This has to be some sort of convoluted OCD thing I am going through. Maybe I should call my damn therapist.
Or maybe if I just rid myself of some other distractions I could get my shit together. Facebook is a fucking time suck for me. It's kind of hard to let that go though because I am also a lonely old hag who is stuck in the house all day with no license and only her kid and dog to talk to.
My poor husband.... I must make him insane.
I'm making myself insane.
Is this hormones again?
For now, I am staying live. Hopefully things will settle the hell down a bit when I can actually fit my belly underneath a damn keyboard. Because, you know, not being able to actually write at a computer could be more than half my freaking problem, right?
Thursday, February 27, 2014
We do actually know when The Critter will make his debut and damn, is it weird. The time is still up in the air and of course, nothing is set in stone but whoa..... he's going to be here in just a few short weeks.
I should probably finish the nursery, huh?
Thursday, February 13, 2014
So yeah..... The Critter is big. Probably going to be bigger than his brother. Or would have been if I were to carry him as long but it appears I won't be carrying him as long because my doctor wants to schedule a c section. This makes me nervous, of course because HELLO...... cutting me open and shit! But I will do what I have to do to keep this turd safe.
That's what mothers do, duh.